You might be better off. ♫

Oh my gosh!

Lately I've been dreaming a lot of freak things. And the dreams are so real that I get freaked out all day long! So I'm going to make a little introdution about it.

There's this guy... He's been my friend like... 5 years. But he travelled and stayed abroad 3 years or more, I can't remember well. We spoke a few, but never missed the touch. And now he's back and we're dying to see each other. 

The fact is: we love each other so much, and we've talking every day and making plans for this big day: our reunion.

But, I think that's something more going on... And I realize that are. I'm afraid of what can happens.. Like I said in the other post, I'm not a easy person...

Well, what I really want to talk is about the dream I had.

I dreamed that we finally see each other again. And he was extremely disappointed when he saw me. I wasn't anymore the person he thought I was. And I read this trough his eyes, and didn't know what to do or say... and he was feeling bound to stay with me. 

It was awful! And I felt horrible all day.

The point is: will he still love me when he realize that I am not as beautiful or easy as he imagined? Beauty today regard so much. More than quality!

I know he's not this kinda of guy... But the dream was so real, that i'm still freaking out! :/

Music: Seeing other people - Belle and Sebastian

I'm gonna make somebody love me!

I'm strange. And I mean it.

When I felt for someone and this person is not there for me, I simply do everything I can to change its opinion. And not praising me, but normally I can.

I cannot remember the last guy I wanted to be with that I didn't make happen. Even for a night.

The problem is: when he falls in love with me, i always do something to hurt him and push him away.

Conclusion: I'm always alone.

And always wishing that someone loves me trully and that I can love him too.

Music: Do you want to - Franz Ferdinand

Stay out of trouble

Well... Today I was talking with Roberta, my best friend. She has just move to another state and I am missing her a lot. It is good that invented Skype! Then we were catching up.

Changing completely the matter, last thrusday after the event that I spoke in the other post, I called to Victor. Only that were 4:30 am!

Of course that he was asleep. Today he came to me with that and I almost falls lasts for shame!

And he also said that he'll be in a MPB festival wich i also will be on 12 september. Isn't it great? I'm dyiiiiiiiiiiing to see him!

He was my first boyfriend, when i has 18 yo! But since we broke up [cause i went in university and change the city i used to live] we continuing being good friends, caring about each other and stuff.

Yey!

Music: Stay out of trouble - Kings of Convenience